This morning, I briefly listened to Rush Limbaugh, one of the original loudmouthed right-wing clowns. And Limbaugh was discussing the BP catastrophe. (By the way, just in case you are wondering, Limbaugh has asserted that the dangers of the spill have been overstated.) And he somewhat predictably blamed the spill on "environmentalist wackos." (I believe that is the phrase he used.) You see, if it weren't for environmentalists, oil companies would be able to drill in shallow water, closer to the shore, where a catastrophe like the one we're witnessing could have been easily avoided. Since the law does not allow for that, the oil companies must drill in far deeper water, for us!
Hey Rush, as Mom used to tell me, you don't have to do anything but die and pay taxes, you bastard.
And another thing, Rush: is it really accurate to blame this spill on environmentalists? Let's think about this, you bastard. Government can't do anything right. Isn't that so? If you want anything done right, you have to hand it over to the private sector, and just get out of their way. Isn't that right? Surely even a prescription drug addict such as yourself can see that. Now, here's the problem. First, you can't say on the one hand that oil production ought to be left to the private sector but then on the other hand absolve them of any responsibility if things go wrong. Second, this whole BP spill is yet more proof that the private sector can fuck something up just as badly as government can, if not worse. Handing everything over to the private sector is not going to solve all of our problems. Take your copy of Atlas Shrugged to the recycling center and grow up, asshole.
And finally, it seems to me that if anyone is ultimately responsible for this catastrophe, it's people like you, Rush, and all those Republicans who have fought against raising automobile fuel efficiency standards. You see, had we been able to make car companies produce more fuel-efficient cars, we might not have needed BP to drill in the deep Gulf water to get oil for our ridiculous-looking gargantuan trucks and SUV's. So actually, the environmentalists are our friends since they support more fuel-efficient automobiles, you repulsive bastard.
Limbaugh's rant against environmentalists came in a segment in which Limbaugh claimed that Obama has been so slow to respond to the catastrophe because he has no idea what to do, as if Obama is somehow responsible for this mess. How do the folks on the right complain about government regulation on the one hand, and then also complain when the government is too slow to clean up a corporation's mess? Isn't that BP's job? Or is is that BP can't handle the responsibility and the Nanny State has to come save the day? Oh, I see how it is now: privatize the profits, socialize the catastrophe.
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